University is a time of trials and learning; this is a well-known fact among incoming Brock students. What people tend to leave out, however, is that with the experiences of meeting new people, trying new classes, and growing into yourself comes an inevitable tendency to compare.
You will meet people who have more experience, friends, and credits than you. If you’ve ever walked into a room thinking everyone seems to understand this but me, you’re in good company.
For many students, especially those coming into first year or transferring into a new program, the feeling of being behind is more common than you think.
The transition into university is a greater adjustment than most students are prepared for. Grading is harsher, courses move faster, and it is easy to feel alone in a sea of students in each class. Juggling courses, a new demanding social life, and university involvement is not something that comes naturally.
For transfer or mature students, this feeling of being behind is beyond academics. As a transfer student myself, I know the experience all too well of being the odd one out among friends who seem to have it all figured out.
While people are having conversations about life after graduating or job prospects, transfer students are often delayed by credit requirements. Feeling behind in ‘life’ is isolating and discouraging, and often leads to a need to rush through your schooling.
While this ‘rushing’ is tempting, it is important to realize you will never be an university student again and experience the benefits that come with it. You will not be the only one feeling like this.
In both cases, comparison is the enemy that creates these feelings of doubt. As it turns out, your confidence is not the only casualty; your academic performance and social life suffer too.
Constant comparisons to others left me feeling defeated before even starting assignments, hesitating to ask questions you think everyone already knows, avoiding opportunities you don’t feel qualified for, or spending time worrying about where you should be, creating a cycle that takes you away from the incredible experiences you can have as a student.
The truth is, what you are comparing yourself to is a half-fledged picture of university life. We see others graduating early and not the summer classes they took; we see someone accessing a test, and not the weeks they spent struggling with the coursework. Mindset has the power to change everything.
For incoming students, feeling overwhelmed is something that will happen; this simply comes with adjusting to university. The good news is you’re not the first person who has felt this, and we can help.
Start by taking stock of all your courses: filling a calendar with your due dates is a good place to start. Visually seeing the space you have to study or complete assignments helps with feeling more prepared.
For transfer or mature students feeling delayed, the most important thing to remember is you are not a small percentage of the student population. Since being at Brock, I have met other students in the same situation as me and having the same feelings. You are not as behind as you think.
However, there are still things you can do. Meeting with Brock’s academic advisors gives a lot of clarity into what a realistic graduation timeline looks like. Having this information gives you the ability to accept the path you are on and to begin enjoying it.
Feeling behind is an incredibly discouraging and isolating feeling. I had feelings of embarrassment among my peers for a long time. Although it is not talked about, feeling this way is very normal and common, and no way means you’re failing at university life. By focusing on your own progress, you will soon realize everyone is finding their own pace.